Thursday, January 15, 2009

Out with the old...

Without turning this blog into yet another political rag, W's final address tonight got me thinking about our country and the optimism I am starting to feel with the prospect of a new leader of the free world. I also got thinking about the Bush administration finally vacating the White House, and wondering if the prospect of their soon to become "ex-girlfriend" status is leaving the Bushies a little bitter. Sure, we've already seen the current administration's little jab by not letting the new first family move into the Blair House two weeks early, but will it go beyond that?

Come to find out, most vacating administrations leave their former offices and living spaces completely trashed. Allegedly Clinton's administration all but stuffed chicken bouillon cubes into the incoming President's shower head, turning to high school pranks by cutting phone lines, gluing drawers shut and rendering door locks unusable. Hell, forget the chicken bouillon cubes, it sounds like they did everything but leave a hearty upper-decker.

And now, apparently Bush's folks have done the same thing. Vacating their offices, it seems they have already done some damage. Why do people have to trash their former living spaces? Isn't it good enough just to leave? Why stop to short-sheet the bed or fill a blocked-off doorframe with packing peanuts?

Maybe I'm relating to this since my former neighbors finally vacated the other half of my duplex just a few weeks ago, and they left the place such mess I am shocked I don't have a hazmat incident over on my side. I got home today and was able to see a bit of the work the maintenance guys have ahead of them, and the guys who lived there completely trashed the place. It is going to cost so much money to gut it that firebombing might be a better option. Maybe I'm still just a little bitter that one of them died inside the apartment leaving me to deal with any creepy residual paranormal activity that might prevail.

So, my plea for tonight is this: do a good deed in 2009 and leave wherever you go in the same, if not better, state in which you found it.

That goes for you too, Lame Duck.

p.s. Many of you might be scratching your heads right now, asking yourselves, "Chicken bouillon cubes?" Yes. It's one of my favorite pranks to pull on someone. You squash the cubes into the shower head and then screw it back on. When the unsuspecting showerer gets in and turns on the water, they are bathed in chicken soup.

I believe beef cubes work too, but aren't as effective.

p.s.s. Many of you might be scratching your heads right now, asking yourselves, "Upper-decker?" I'll let you research that one on your own, but probably not while you're at work. From what I've read, it could be considered extremely offensive to upper-deck one's dead grandmother's casket.


Jared said...

Mmmmm...chicken soup shower. Never heard of the upper decker before, but my God...the things people come up with.

As far as the Bushies go, good riddance. Here's a Guinness to hoping we never see another one at the helm.

urban princess said...

Oh sweet Moses. I knew that sentence was coming, and STILL choked on my Dr Pepper. Damn you!

BTW, according to AFB, Upper Deckers are a favorite prank within the military ranks...

Holly said...

Jared: I will be cheersing with Guinness tonight in anticipation.

UP: BWAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!! Yeah, that was one of our finest. That and your random mention of the "Ghost Whisperer" at lunch the other day. Tell AFB that things have apparently changed in the military; when my dad was in the Navy, I guess short-sheeting was the big thing. ;)

Jared said...

I'm cheersing with a Wasatch Devastator Double Bock at the moment. Enjoy the Guinness.