Saturday, July 28, 2007

So Healthy!

Vitamin Water is a sham. I'll just start right out with that and get it off my chest. Vitamin Water is a sham. I used to like Vitamin Water, and up until this afternoon, I used to love drinking a bottle of it after working out. But no more. I will swear off Vitamin Water as a lame excuse for being healthy, and consider it a diet gimmick.

I went to the gym this afternoon for a couple of hours (for real, I'm not trying to sound hard-core. I also drank three beers last night.) and when I was finished, I decided to drag myself to the grocery store for a few things. You know, healthy things one only thinks about after attending the gym for a couple of hours: Bananas. Salad-in-a-bag. Diet Dr. Pepper. And I decided I'd grab a bottle of Vitamin Water to drink on the way home, because come on, how could something called "Dragonfruit" not be healthy?

After reading the label, I threw down the Vitamin Water with utter disgust and I think I actually said, "What the hell?" under my breath. A bottle of very "healthy" Vitamin Water contains 50 calories per serving, with two-point-five servings in each bottle. Now, I'm no math major or anything, in fact, math nearly cost me my Bachelor's degree, but that totals to 125 calories a bottle. That's only 15 calories less than in regular Coke (which I would never drink because I've never been able to stand the aftertaste). That is the same amount of calories one would find in a can of Guinness. Healthy Vitamin Water, my ass!

In fact, straight to one's ass is where the Vitamin Water will go when you read more of the nutritional information and learn that your 125 calorie health drink also contains 13 grams of sugar per serving, or (again, me trying to do math) about eight teaspoons of sugar per bottle. Seems to me plain ol' water and a good multivitamin might just save those calories I worked so hard to lose! Leave the Vitamin Water alone, unless maybe you've got a raging hangover and need some electrolytes.


NinjasOfLoretto said...

i was devastated the day i realized vitamin water was no good for me. unfortunately the addiction was already in place and sometimes, despite all the arguments, i cannot resist a little vitamin water essential (orange)'s so sad.

Holly said...

I was just as upset, trust me!!! But alas, I'd rather drink a beer than waste the calories on water. :) PRIORITIES!

Anonymous said...

Back when Vitamin Water was first getting started it was a give away at some race finish line. It tasted like Crystal Light, except without the taste. If I want a bottle full of sugar (and electrolytes) I'll stick with Gatorade. (Gatorade also recently replaced the fructose and glucose syrups with high fructose corn syrup, so it's doubly gross now).

Holly said...

Plus the COLORS of Gatorade are not natural!

That's why I like beer after a good run!

Anonymous said...

People..try reading the label of things before you buy it, its why they put it on the bottle. there are vitamins in vitaminwater, it doesnt say dietwater on the label, and everyone wonders why the world is going to shit. do research so you dont complain in the future, unless you like complaining, then by all means keep on your idiotic course.