Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Stress Dreams?

Because of a string of consistant, heinous crap unfolding in my personal life, I've had messed up dreams every night. What does it all mean?

Monday night: I'm driving my Jeep and the brakes go out, and the gas doesn't work, yet I'm still able to drive up hills and all over neighborhoods. It isn't until I go over a cliff and throw the Jeep into reverse that I keep from falling over the edge... then my Jeep is stuck in reverse, with the brakes out and no gas, but still going up hills and all over neighborhoods.

Tuesday night: I literally dreamt that I couldn't wake up, and I got freaked out that I couldn't wake up, and then when I woke up this morning, I thought it was a dream and thought I had missed work. Funny thing is, I don't go to work until four o'clock in the afternoon.

Am I a headcase?

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

My Election Season Campaign

It's that time of year when we all try to be more socially aware and make voting choices which we hope will ultimately benefit all mankind... blah blah blah. It's like Christmas for issues-zealots, where we normally wouldn't get involved, but we do because it's "that time of year."

I would rather stick a hot letter opener into my nasal cavity than ever run for public office, which is good since my job is technically a conflict of interest. Still, I feel since it's "that time of year," I need to start some kind of campaign and my campaign is as follows:

'06 Campaign to Make McDreamy Single

Ah yes, Grey's Anatomy's Derek Shepherd, a.k.a. McDreamy, is going to be my personal plight for the season.



I was obsessed with Grey's Anatomy from the first time I saw it as a mid-season replacement on ABC 'lo just a year and a half ago. McDreamy's eyes... McDreamy's hair... the fact that McDreamy didn't roll in on a riding lawnmower a la "Can't Buy Me Love." But it wasn't until I set my VCR for the wrong time and missed last week's Season Three premiere and spent two days scouring the Internet and iTunes TV show store that I realized how sickly obsessed I was.

This season, let's Make McDreamy Single. I can't stand another season of unrequited love and untamed sexual tension between Meredith and McDreamy. I can't stand the fact that McDreamy keeps ripping out Meredith's skinny, little heart and doing the Mexican Hat Dance on it. I can't stand McDreamy's wife Addison who had to sneak her way back into his life after doing the Mexican Hat Dance on his heart.

It's the Ross and Rachel cycle of get together, introduce conflict, break up, pine away, get together, break up... you get the picture. Ross and Rachel finally got together after nine painful years and I simply won't stand to wait until I'm nearly 40 years old to finally see Meredith and McDreamy happy.

Now, I'm not sure what measures I must take in the campaign to Make McDreamy Single, I'll have to consult my political pals for direction. However, I can assure you that from now until the first Tuesday in November, I will have set out a course of action for all of you to jump on my bandwagon and Make McDreamy Single.

This has been a paid announcement by the friends of Make McDreamy Single and the twisted minds who are actually sad enough to care.

Friday, September 22, 2006

Track Stars!!!

So, every week in the City Weekly, they get "local celebs" to pick their favorite songs and/or what they're listening to on the iPods right now.
This week, they chose some of the folks of Nightside, including Yours Truly.

Check it out here:
City Weekly

Thanks, Bill Frost!

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

What's Yer Pirate Name?

I've always loved pirates. I want to be one... or a mermaid.
Either one is pretty cool. From now on, call me Black Jenny Cash.



My pirate name is:


Black Jenny Cash



Like anyone confronted with the harshness of robbery on the high seas, you can be pessimistic at times. You're musical, and you've got a certain style if not flair. You'll do just fine. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com.
part of the fidius.org network

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

A Thousand Different Ways...

...to laugh your butt off and/or throw up from laughter.

Yes, cutie pie little Clay Aiken has released his second album to "Measure of a Man" today, and I have to say that it was bad enough that the thing starts out with his version of that popular Richard Marx classic "Right Here Waiting." But when the thing actually got to "Everything I do" and "Broken Wings" I had to shut the thing off.

I was in tears. It's because I was laughing.

So nevermind Clay has that little twinkle in his eye... skip the CD and read an issue of Tiger Beat.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Coincidence, or No?

Here's a poster, circa 1979, used to promote Pakistan Airlines.

Creepy.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Oxygen Spa Night



Jeff from the O2 Oxygen Spa in Salt Lake came in tonight and juiced us up. I chose "Serenity," a combination of lavendar and I believe eucalyptus. I feel mellow. I also would like a pizza, a bag of Doritos and maybe a Slim Jim...

...I am serene.

Try this stuff!!! The O2 Oxygen Spa it freaking rocks! They also have facials, massages and all kinds of things!

Thursday, September 07, 2006

A Showdown I'd Like to See

Just a little quickie I was thinking about...

Whose baby is better?
Brangelina?
TomKat?

Let's put Suri and Shiloh together in a ring full of Jell-O and let them duke it out;

...because Tom versus Angelina would just be too easy.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Suri is an Adopted Chinese Baby in a Toupee


I believe the title of this post says it all.

For months now I have been skeptical as to the existence of TomKat's Suri Cruise, and now after tonight's showing on Katie Couric's debut night on CBS Evening News, I am wondering if this child was lab-created.

Isn't there some law that states you're not allowed to wig your newly adopted Chinese baby?
With a bad rug at that?

Alert the authorities!!!