Stress Dreams?

Because of a string of consistant, heinous crap unfolding in my personal life, I've had messed up dreams every night. What does it all mean?

Monday night: I'm driving my Jeep and the brakes go out, and the gas doesn't work, yet I'm still able to drive up hills and all over neighborhoods. It isn't until I go over a cliff and throw the Jeep into reverse that I keep from falling over the edge... then my Jeep is stuck in reverse, with the brakes out and no gas, but still going up hills and all over neighborhoods.

Tuesday night: I literally dreamt that I couldn't wake up, and I got freaked out that I couldn't wake up, and then when I woke up this morning, I thought it was a dream and thought I had missed work. Funny thing is, I don't go to work until four o'clock in the afternoon.

Am I a headcase?

My Election Season Campaign

It's that time of year when we all try to be more socially aware and make voting choices which we hope will ultimately benefit all mankind... blah blah blah. It's like Christmas for issues-zealots, where we normally wouldn't get involved, but we do because it's "that time of year."

I would rather stick a hot letter opener into my nasal cavity than ever run for public office, which is good since my job is technically a conflict of interest. Still, I feel since it's "that time of year," I need to start some kind of campaign and my campaign is as follows:

'06 Campaign to Make McDreamy Single
Ah yes, Grey's Anatomy's Derek Shepherd, a.k.a. McDreamy, is going to be my personal plight for the season.



I was obsessed with Grey's Anatomy from the first time I saw it as a mid-season replacement on ABC 'lo just a year and a half ago. McDreamy's eyes... McDreamy's hair... the fact that McDreamy didn't roll in on a riding lawnmower a la "Can't Buy Me Love." But it wasn't until I set my VCR for the wrong time and missed last week's Season Three premiere and spent two days scouring the Internet and iTunes TV show store that I realized how sickly obsessed I was.

This season, let's Make McDreamy Single. I can't stand another season of unrequited love and untamed sexual tension between Meredith and McDreamy. I can't stand the fact that McDreamy keeps ripping out Meredith's skinny, little heart and doing the Mexican Hat Dance on it. I can't stand McDreamy's wife Addison who had to sneak her way back into his life after doing the Mexican Hat Dance on his heart.

It's the Ross and Rachel cycle of get together, introduce conflict, break up, pine away, get together, break up... you get the picture. Ross and Rachel finally got together after nine painful years and I simply won't stand to wait until I'm nearly 40 years old to finally see Meredith and McDreamy happy.

Now, I'm not sure what measures I must take in the campaign to Make McDreamy Single, I'll have to consult my political pals for direction. However, I can assure you that from now until the first Tuesday in November, I will have set out a course of action for all of you to jump on my bandwagon and Make McDreamy Single.

This has been a paid announcement by the friends of Make McDreamy Single and the twisted minds who are actually sad enough to care.

Track Stars!!!

So, every week in the City Weekly, they get "local celebs" to pick their favorite songs and/or what they're listening to on the iPods right now.
This week, they chose some of the folks of Nightside, including Yours Truly.

Check it out here:
City Weekly

Thanks, Bill Frost!

What's Yer Pirate Name?

I've always loved pirates. I want to be one... or a mermaid.
Either one is pretty cool. From now on, call me Black Jenny Cash.

My pirate name is:

Black Jenny Cash

Like anyone confronted with the harshness of robbery on the high seas, you can be pessimistic at times. You're musical, and you've got a certain style if not flair. You'll do just fine. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com.
part of the fidius.org network

A Thousand Different Ways...

...to laugh your butt off and/or throw up from laughter.

Yes, cutie pie little Clay Aiken has released his second album to "Measure of a Man" today, and I have to say that it was bad enough that the thing starts out with his version of that popular Richard Marx classic "Right Here Waiting." But when the thing actually got to "Everything I do" and "Broken Wings" I had to shut the thing off.

I was in tears. It's because I was laughing.

So nevermind Clay has that little twinkle in his eye... skip the CD and read an issue of Tiger Beat.

Coincidence, or No?

Here's a poster, circa 1979, used to promote Pakistan Airlines.

Creepy.

Oxygen Spa Night

Jeff from the O2 Oxygen Spa in Salt Lake came in tonight and juiced us up. I chose "Serenity," a combination of lavendar and I believe eucalyptus. I feel mellow. I also would like a pizza, a bag of Doritos and maybe a Slim Jim...

...I am serene.

Try this stuff!!! The O2 Oxygen Spa it freaking rocks! They also have facials, massages and all kinds of things!

A Showdown I'd Like to See

Just a little quickie I was thinking about...

Whose baby is better?
Brangelina?
TomKat?

Let's put Suri and Shiloh together in a ring full of Jell-O and let them duke it out;

...because Tom versus Angelina would just be too easy.

Suri is an Adopted Chinese Baby in a Toupee

I believe the title of this post says it all.

For months now I have been skeptical as to the existence of TomKat's Suri Cruise, and now after tonight's showing on Katie Couric's debut night on CBS Evening News, I am wondering if this child was lab-created.

Isn't there some law that states you're not allowed to wig your newly adopted Chinese baby?
With a bad rug at that?

Alert the authorities!!!

Jo Jo's Munch House

You can't see it very well, but it's true, there is a place called "Jo Jo's Munch House" on State Street in Salt Lake City.

They had a fish sandwich special advertised by writing with what looked like White Out on the window.

Jo Jo's Munch House.

Creepy Guy Comparison of the Week

Remember the Heaven's Gate guy, Marshall Applewhite who led his cult to kill themselves in San Deigo so they could eventually return to the Mother Ship?



Just an older version of current freakshow John Mark Karr.

I *Heart* the Internet

Blogs and comment postings are becoming like buttholes, everyone's got 'em. I ran across this little tidbit of internet gold today and couldn't let it pass! ("pass": refer in the sense of "buttholes," mentioned above) And if you'd like the direct link, please click over to here

"Holly is outright annoying. Her interview skills aren't good. Her voice is one of the worst I've heard on the radio. Her questions for guests seemed scripted - which makes their shallow triteness even worse.

And, for the record, Holly was never a news reporter as she claimed once during the Destiny search. Reading pre-written news scripts on ZHT do not make a news reporter.

But we know now that if you want to shut her up, all you have to do is point out that she is single on air. I could feel the discomfort.

I've listened only a few times since the show started. It is getting more polished but I still don't enjoy it.

I hope this feedback is a little more helpful than the smartass comment I left earlier.

Posted by Anonymous | August 04, 2006 10:46 AM"

Anonymous? You need a hug? Did I steal your boyfriend because I'm cuter than you? Come on, what's the skinny? Me? Thank you very much!

I look at this stuff and I laugh out loud, or LOL for someone obviously so posting-savvy. There's so much I could say to this, but why waste the effort on something so stupid? However, I do appreciate that you're taking the time to keep up on Utah radio and where I've been and what I've allegedly done! It actually shows, Anonymous, that you're a true fan! Thanks for listening!

Grammar Watch pt. 1

Today I decided to look for all the bad grammar in the world. Lo' and behold, I found this little gem on the way home from the gym. A Oreo shake? Hmmm...

The Incredible Shrinking Richie

This week's US Weekly is off the chain, as it goes into the incredible shrinking Nicole Richie. Homegirl is just too small and needs to eat a sandwich, I actually feel bad for the girl. What's more, she's damned if she do and damned if she don't-- if she's too fat, she hears about it. If she's too skinny, she hears about it. In fact, one member of the paparazzi yelled at her that she was too f***ing skinny. She actually got up in his face and told him that he wouldn't be yelling at her if she were fat.

To this, I say amen.

Sure, she looks horrible, but it's something she's dealing with and obviously knows that she's able to double as an anatomy class skeleton. My point? Stop hating! Let's hate Tom Cruise some more if we want to hate someone...

Anyway, judge it for yourself-- just don't yell it out at Nicole.

Holy Shrimp, Batman!

I'm not a religious person, but I do have to admire this shrimp's ability to channel a special spirit. This shrimp tail was originally discarded by a California man, but on second look he saw the face of Jesus. He believed it was a sign-- he just went through a nasty divorce with his wife.

Happy Fourth of July!!

Up yours, Kim Jong Il!!!

What Ever Happened to... ?

Thursday nights in the 80s were great because I knew I could always look forward to the wacky antics on Bill Cosby and his crazy television kids. Apparently, I was feeling a bit nostalgic tonight, and since it is Thursday, I was thinking to myself... Whatever happened to the folks on The Cosby Show?

Let's begin with when Cosby jumped the shark. Little Rudy had gotten to be bigger Rudy and so the show needed to add a different cute and precocious little girl to warm the hearts of America's viewers. Hence, Raven Symone.

In this picture, Raven Symone is wearing a haute couture trash bag to some sort of event.


Moving onto to the above-mentioned Rudy... Kiesha Knight Pullam decided to edumacate herself and get a Sociology degree from some college in Atlanta. More importantly, this picture shows that she is an intelligent 25-year-old and doesn't need to do anything like pose in her underwear to prove stuff.


Tempestt Bledsoe has grown up as well. She went from playing the Jan Brady-esque Vanessa Huxtable to current body-double for former American Idol winner Fantasia Barrino.


Probably the Cosby kid who aged the best is Malcom Jamal Warner who played the wry brother/dyslexic student Theo. Warner is a musician and music video director now, who started his own label called "Miles Long;" which I think is a bit presumptious. Still, he's hot.


The very cool and slightly edgy Denise Huxtible was played by Lenny Kravitz's ex-wife Lisa Bonet who I believe was a porn star before showing up and the über-cool singer in High Fidelity. But before that, she was on a Different World and was hospitalized for smoking Dwayne Wayne's flip-up sunglasses.


So there's the Thursday night tribute, makes you wish there was a little less reality TV in the world, no?

Oh. My. God.

It's been awhile, kiddies. I've had some family stuff going on, I've had some long-distance stuff going on, I've had some job stuff going on; but I'm trying to regroup and reboot and get through it all.

It's like a rebirth, right?

And with that, I give you White Trash Barbie on the cover of next month's Bazaar Magazine.

Fun with Mentos and Diet Coke

New hair picture on demand!